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Category Archives: Sheep
#25 ‘Ware Santaman
Thursday, January 24, 2008
The Elfs and Elves defeated, we a-charged the uppity-stair past the glitter-halls of Consumpce and the shimmer-aisles of Green-Eye and the heaved hordes of Goods, towards that lord of the Mothership of Mass Consumption, the Red Man of the Red Star, He Who Births Christmas, the One and Only Repetitive and Timeless One, the Santaman. [...]
#24 On the Heads of Elves
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
With a crash we were upon them! The Big Fat Star breach’d, the elves a-fear-ten’d! Our moment was now!
#23 Onwards the Ship
Tuesday, January 15, 2008
The hand, a magmatic, igneous extrusion of the Earth Herself, took it upon itself to uplift most suddenly and send us hurtling towards the sky-hooked Mothership of the Big Fat Star. Now I saw how Bloodmonkey could be confident, though the motion of this rocky ocean was causing sentiments of nausea and ground-love to churn [...]
#22 Elevatio
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Bloodmonkey moved his hand in complex motion and touched a bead he bore upon his belt. Suddenly the ground beneath the Kurmatum al Hurd shook and lurched and groaned. Aghast I spake, “What’s thou done? This earth quack, is it doing of yours?” To which Bloodmonkey chortled, “Nay, I petted the Earth and this is [...]
#21 Contemplatio
Monday, January 7, 2008
“But regard! T’ seasons past, the diesel whales were slow,” I cried. But with dismissive snort Bloodmonkey lectured on the calendrical conundrum and the Crossedmanday celebrated by the Right Believers this very silent night. “Agreed,” I wailed, “But look, the Fat Red Star hangs limpid and malevolent in yon sky, while this rockship, this [...]
#18 The Big Fat Star
Thursday, December 6, 2007
The Big Fat Star, known to men as that of Bethlehem, was beheld by Captain Bloodmonkey. And he *knew*. He knew it was no Star. Rather, it was the exhaust vent of the Jolly Wagon of Destruction, the Machine of Consumption, the Flaming Mothership of Mass. He gave the order and the Rock Ship Kurmatum [...]
#17: The Pirate Sheep
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
Twenty days to Xmas. Still time to loot for presents and sell your soul for trinkets and baguettes. I read somewhere that in the UK alone 3 bn. euros worth of unwanted presents are given per Xmas.
Hamsterday 5: David
Monday, November 26, 2007
It being precisely 503 years 2 months and 19 days after the unveiling of Michelangelo’s David, which is the equivlent of One Solar Chariot and a Smidgen, Hamster has unveiled its pezzo di resistenza.
#15 The Film Festiphal
Friday, November 23, 2007
It is the nature of film festivals that they present too much in too little time for too much money. Much like special store discounts and 2 for 1 offerings.